The dead are at the gates of our kingdom and we must find a way to save the living. And in this moment Jon comes up with a genius plan: To bring a zombie to Cersei. Perhaps in the parody version of the series, this plot would have worked but here we must consider on how many levels it did not make sense.
The most important factor is that nothing would change for Cersei even if she believes in the existence of the Night King. For her, the most threatening enemy would be again Jon and Daenerys and her priority would still be to destroy them. Besides, Cersei Lannister would prefer a world of the dead without an Iron Throne rather than a world of the living in which she does not sit on it. It is not clear why Jon accepted as a fact that Cersei is a humanist who cares about the surviving of mankind. The only thing Cersei cares about is her own fate.
Second, the decision to send five or six people beyond the Wall to kidnap one zombie from a giant army did not seem a brilliant strategic move. What was the probability of them coming back alive? Zero. The risk of losing some of the most important people in the war cannot be justified with winning over an ally who would stab you in the back at first chance. Also, how much time exactly did they lose with this journey? Why did Daenerys let them go if she did not believe in the dead men? Did Jon actually leave future of the North and the whole world to chance, going on a doomed mission? There are quite a few questions that characters should have asked themselves.
Now, let’s move to the actual events beyond the Wall. First, we must highlight who went there: Jon, Jorah, the Hound, Thormund, Beric, Thoros, and Gendry. It is difficult to determine if the absurdity or the boredom prevails. We cannot miss sir Davos who dramatically stayed behind so that he doesn’t slow them down. The journey was full of tense dialogues, for example, the one about the synonyms of the word “penis”. After all, who wouldn’t do just like Sandor and Thormund and wouldn’t indulge into deep thoughts when he goes to an almost certain death. Meanwhile, the negative temperatures did not impress anyone and they wandered calmly without covering their heads.
The actions of the Night King and his subordinate was an ultimate-magnitude idioticity. When they surrounded Jon and his buddies, their plan was to… stand. No one tried to kill them from a distance. The Night King didn’t throw an ice spear at them. Nothing. But when the zombie saw that the stone did not break the ice, it started walking. One must ask oneself how a skeleton without a single neuron was able to make the logical connection that if the stone doesn’t break the ice, it is safe to pass. It wouldn’t have been weird if the Night King had given them a command to walk but… this was not the case.
The zombies cannot swim and the Night King does not have power over water. Really? A superior ice wizard cannot freeze water… Interesting. Someone should check their premises. There is simply no logic and it is stupid to give the dead two elements as their weaknesses, fire and water. We can expect that in the next episode they will turn out to be allergic to the atmosphere and they will just fall down and die. And as if all this wasn’t dumb enough, the episode ended with an underwater party for Viseryon’s birthday. How did they dive in when they can’t go into the water? Where did they find the chains for the dragon? Maybe the Night King melted with his magic fire the armors and the swords of those he had killed throughout the years… That probably wouldn’t surprise anyone anymore.
The relationship between the Night King and Jon had an unexpected resolution. After they spent years to persuade us that the army of the dead chases Jon because their leader has a special attitude towards him the Night King simply let Jon sink in the icy water and die. Makes sense. How Favorite Snow manage to resurface remains a riddle and the next moments again present us with the “which is sadder” dilemma: The fact that a man on a horse with a tiny fire in his hand can slow down a huge army or that Jon skipped dying from hypothermia. It is possible that the Starks are immune to low temperature but this hasn’t been said anywhere so it remains a nonsense.
After we waited for Jon and Daenerys to meet and fall in love for five books and six seasons, finally the moment arrived. Let’s see what exactly happened in the romance of the century. Act I: Jon and Daenerys see each other for a first time. Act II: Jon and Daenerys discuss how he will call her. Act III: Jon and Daenerys have cheap sex. Actually, the rumour that they are supposedly in love we learned from Tyrion and Davos.
After all the anxiety we went through, expecting the most obnoxious love story in literature and cinema, was it really not gooey enough? Where was the first kiss? Where were the unrestrained cries: Daenerys, I love you., Jon, I love you too.? Where was the scene where he saved her life by standing between her and the Night King? Jon and Daenerys deserved disgusting ickyness, not absolutely nothing.
We have to give it to them that both of them reached the bottom of their own individual patheticness. When Daenerys stood at the top of the tower and looked at the wildness behind the Wall, some of us naively thought that she was hurting for Viseryon. But no. The contemptible lowlife was waiting for Jon. The loss of her dragon hadn’t impressed her.
Jon, on the other hand, decided to accept Daenerys as his queen and to betray himself, his family’s honor, and the North. Jon Snow does not betray those who have given him their trust. House Stark would never again bow head to House Targaryen. The North is proud and free from any external control. These factors were considered negligible. But we did not see the scene in which Jon kneels.
At the end, in this most tense and most awaited episode of the most spectacular and most unpredictable season… nothing happened. All main characters were at the same place at the same time and no one died? This doesn’t sound like Game of Thrones.
At the meeting in the dragon pits, there were several characters without whose presence the episode would have been impossible. How could we wait until the next season if we didn’t find out what would Podrick and Tyrion say to one another? How could we sleep calmly without Bronn’s thoughts and the dramatic make-up between Brienne and the Hound. No, the second-to-last season of Game of Thrones could not have ended without these key scenes. The absence of Missandei in the last episode was hard enough. Even the appearance of Grey Worm wouldn’t have reassured us enough if it wasn’t for the support of Jorah who appeared to do nothing. It’s hard to say which would be more senseless: for Jorah to survive and to go back to Daenerys, as it happened, or to die beyond the Wall, doing something stupid, and wasting film time.
The most important thing, however, was that the great plan was fulfilled and the zombie was delivered to King’s Landing. Cersei, Jon, and Daenerys will talk for the first time. One wrong word is enough for everything to fail. The atmosphere cannot be any more tense, anxiety has filled everyone’s chest. And here, once again, the two queens gave way to the more important characters, in this case Euron Greyjoy. Euron started the most important meeting in the show and he is joined by the traitor Tyrion. Why not, as we bear in mind the dialogues we watched in the previous scenes. The dramatic moments included, of course, the long-awaited reunion of the Hound and the Mountain. It was contained to a five-second mutual stare and the deep comment what have they done to him. That’s enough for those two, we should save more time for Bronn.
But amidst the catastrophes dominating the end of the season, one character remained completely perfect. Cersei Lannister. She behaved wonderfully during the whole meeting of the two queens, and her glances were great. Every time she looked at Jaime, Tyrion, or Daenerys, her eyes showed what she thought. And, because of the absurdity of the situation, every time it was the same thing: “Really?!”
But Cersei made an excellent performance with her words as well. At first she felt terror because of the dragons’ size but she recovered quickly and with her natural niceness she hinted that Daenerys was late. It was really disappointing that Daenerys did not fall and break her neck when she got off the dragon. Now, that would have been a shocking twist. But Cersei’s stone face expressed everyone’s disappointment.
To the warning that her armies and her people will transform into zombies, Cersei replied simply that for most of them that would be an improvement. Right on target. Of course, as in every other time in which the individual tells the truth in its purest form, the crowd decided that it was a joke.
And at the end, she gave us a marvelous dose of cynicism. “I know that Ned Stark’s son will keep his word.” What a touching moral appeal. And it comes from the woman who killed Ned Stark through a pathetic betrayal. How can you resist liking her?
Of course, Cersei promised to help them in the war against the dead without any intention to keep her promise. After all, this is Cersei Lannister and any other action would have been crazy. She knows that Jon and Daenerys are as dead as the Night King and plans to remain among the living. Somewhere, there was the detail of her pregnancy… but probably not.
After the departure of all low intruders from King’s Landing, Cersei had to discuss her obvious decision with Jaime. However, then he made an unexpected accusation against her: “But, Cersei, you are being yourself.” According to the creators of the show, the man who knows her since their mother’s womb and who loves her more than everything else in the world because she is what she is, hadn’t understood that she would not support Jon and Daenerys. Cersei does not care about the dead. She thinks only about herself and Jaime and, honestly, in this moment they are the only people who are truly alive. The idea that he could leave her in such a moment is beyond every absurdity. Jaime stands up next to Cersei, ready to defeat all of their enemies, as in every other battle.
In the last episode there was another truly exciting plotline – the actions of Theon Greyjoy. His character would have been damaged if it wasn’t for the half-an-hour-long dialogue with Jon who forgave him and gave him advice for the future. Theon, inspired by this conversation, decided to change his life and save his sister. But it turned out that no one wanted to join him. He had to defend himself. The fight was uneven, but no one suspected about Theon’s secret weapon. The fact that Ramsey had deprived him of some specific body parts was key for his victory and he won the right to fight against his uncle. Now we know that there will be at least one plotline to stand next to Grey Worm and Missandei, and to Melisandre’s return.
In order to give us a break from the frantic drama in King’s Landing and Dragonstone, the episode took us to Winterfell for a while. And it culminated in its imbecility. Petyr Baelish Littlefinger was the reason for the whole plot until this moment. He started the war, he turned the Starks and the Lannisters against one another, he maneuvered and found a way up between the armies of the high lords and the lust for power of the most influential people in the kingdom. This person was killed by two dumb little girls who could not even realize the size of his genius.
“I am the most skillful evil genius who doesn’t have anything but will rise using only his mind. I manipulate everyone and everything will go faultlessly until I am very close. But then, a little magician will appear who will tell the weakling and the psychopath that I am bad and the three of them will kill me.” This plot does NOT exist. It is simply not serious and it is offensive to every viewer.
Littlefinger was close to fulfilling his intentions but not close enough. His final goal was to sit on the Iron Throne and there wasn’t a big probability that he would do that soon. He surely had a plan which would have given him the crown but we could not see this plan to an end.
Another worrying moment was the murder itself. When you sentence a lord to death you do not execute him two seconds later at the middle of Winterfell’s great hall. When you are a member of House Stark you ensure a dignified death for your enemies. You do not let the blood of a traitor spill in the same room where you and your heirs will rule in the future. Besides, the lords of the North who calmly watched this scene should have felt concerned that Ned Stark’s little daughter kills people in this manner. Instead, they almost applauded her.
Meanwhile, the long-awaited revelation about Jon Snow’s past finally took place. And as the logical thinking dictates, crucial information about the main character is announced by two nobodies. Bran told Sam that Jon is actually Aegon Targaryen. Why not. We can expect that in the next episode Missandei and Grey Worm will tell us the identity of the Night King and at the end, Jorah will sit on the Iron Throne.
Besides, the mentioned revelation does not dignify Jon as they tried to suggest us. It just humiliates Targaryen. The greatest House ever lived has been lowered to Jon and Daenerys – two banal hollows. And since we are talking about humiliations of great houses, let’s take a look at the Starks.
Sansa, who from a spineless nobody transformed into a cruel spineless nobody. Arya who became merciless killer in the name of… nothing. And Bran, who doesn’t remember his own self anymore. This is where the heirs of the great Catelyn and Ned Stark ended up. There is something seriously concerning in the fact that in the song of ice and fire, we now listen about lack of identity and spiritual death.
We reached the fall of the Wall. Did we really break it for three minutes? The great eight-thousand years old magical wall which cannot be crossed by anything and anyone. The legendary barrier between the two worlds was destroyed in passing, as if it were an unimportant detail. This is absurd. You cannot spend seven seasons telling legends about the Wall and transform it into a fundamental factor in the world of Game of Thrones and then simply squeeze it to a pathetic three-minute scene. The destruction of the Wall deserved its own episode but apparently the fight against Theon and nobody was more important.
When the wildlings tried to cross it, we dedicated a whole episode to their battle with Jon which, at the end, did not lead to anything big but now when the bases of the show were changed with an event which determines the whole plot of the last season, a few shots were completely enough.
The way the Wall fell was also absurd. A dragon flew over, it blew some fire… and that was it. The Night King could have flown over the wall, killed everyone, and opened the gates. There could have been a major battle scene in which people defend the Wall and the dead attack it with all of their weapons. But not. Stupidity was a must. Did actually no main character witness the fall? While the most crucial event for their lives took place, all characters were at the other side of Westeros talking about the weather over a cup of tea. The viewers already expected the dead Viseryon to fly over their heads during their conversation and someone to point at him with a finger. The Wall is one of the main characters and its destruction required a minimum of one hour of dramatic battle and unexpected twists. Everything else is an offense to the show.